When your mom cries to you about missing your ex.. .
From being the person who you knew every single detail of their daily routine,
to someone who you can now barely bring yourself to say their name.
I go through periods of my life now where I really feel like I can move on from you Amanda, so the old emotional messages and photos are deleted and I feel like im moving forward. But when I look through the lies and unravel the truth your still there.. The reason why I do anything. It doesn’t matter if its me working on the cars, or the person I am today, or even the career I want to have… It all falls back to wanting to give u everything I can be. Supporting you with all of your needs. Dedicating all my time, all of me to you. When I think alot, or when I stumble upon something, or watch your old videos I the grief and loneliness are more then I can handle, the day is done at that point, and so will the next. No one knows the amount of thought that happens when im at work, its honestly probably the reason I fuck up so much. My mind is always elsewhere, thinking of the past.. Where there were no paper agreements, no drama from friends, all there was was YOU and LOVE.